Who's going on Celebrity Big Brother? Part Two

The Boys

Coolio

Following in the footsteps of Flava Flav, old skool rapper Coolio looks like he's had to resort to reality TV. Is that part of Gangsta's Paradise? Whether he'll be bringing that fat chap LV along to provide substance is not clear.

Coolio - Hats off.

Lembit Opik

Sian Lloyd-dumping, Cheeky Girl-humping, paraglider-bumping (look it up) Leicester City fan and Lib Dem MP Lembit Opik will not be bringing his crooked grin to the house according to today's Sun, but I have seen it mooted, so it's good enough for me.

The leaning lear of Lembit

Steve Strange

Celebrity Scissorhands stalwart and 80s weirdo Steve Strange is absolutely determined to have a nervous breakdown on television. I'll give him three days, which will be stretched to three weeks of piss poor jokes by Scott pissing Mills.

Strange and Mills - Funny strange or funny haha? Neither.

Bobby Brown

Whitney Houston's husband is, according to the Daily Mail a few days ago, set to grace the Big Brother house with his troubled presence. I can't really see him being bothered to be honest, but it's his prerogative.

Bobby Brown - What have I done?

Paul Michael Glaser

Face from the A-Team was in it last year, so why not Starsky? Probably because the Daily Mail has mentioned him, and look to have plucked a load of names out of the air. He has done panto though, so he must be on the skids.

Paul Michael Glaser - Doesn't own Manchester United

Verne Troyer

Mini Me! One of the stars of the short-lived Shasta McNasty, Verne Troyer will be well worth having on and it seems bolted on that he will be. Apparently they're installing smaller stairs. Superb.

Verne Troyer - Big shoes to fill

Terry Christian

Dani Behr's former co-host on The Word, meaning that Hufty will be on the next big reality show. I completely jinxed Dani Behr from winning I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here, so I might back Terry Christian to win Celebrity Big Brother.

I won't be publishing saucy pictures of him. Christ no.

Terry Christian - Hopefully not the twat he's made out to be.

Ben Adams

So one of A1 gets to be on Celebrity Big Brother, but one of Northern Line had to go on the normal one? Where's the consistency?

Here's how famous Ben Adams is: When The Guardian ran their Celebrity Big Brother Preview, they labelled the wrong member of A1 as Ben Adams. Superb.

Apparently he had a go on Jo O'Meara.

Ben Adams - Centre

Tommy Sheridan

A Scottish Politician who, from what little I've read of him, sounds like a bell end.

Tommy Sheridan - May or may not be a bell end. Don't care.

Ian Wright (Wright Wright)

Speaking of bell ends, Ian Wright might be involved, although I can't see even Big Brother inflicting him on people. He'd have to talk about something other than talented footballers who aren't his son, and he'd have to put some socks on. It would be good to see him in an argument with Terry Christian though. Or trying to get into Ulrika.

Ian Wright - Socks not pictured