Tee Du Jour - Camel Toe by CTRL

There isn't a lot I can add to this. It's by CTRL.



Oh, and it's available for a knock-down £15 from Roktic

Four o'clock funny - I am the Devil. Good evening.

"We try to keep things informal here, as well as infernal."

More from the excellent Rowan Atkinson Live. Helpfully, this has Spanish subtitles. So you can learn while you laugh.

Take on Me at 3

A-ha weren't technically one-hit wonders. Not in the UK anyway. However, to add justification to making this the last in my ad hoc series of daily videos, this is the much-vaunted 'literal version' of the video and song. It's quality.



And relax.

Sneaks Du Jour - Barneys x Converse Punched Leather Chuck Taylors

Ok, so we don't have Barney's in the UK, and these aren't out until February anyway, but that doesn't stop me wanting them. Or the other colours that I'll be posting up.



They are Perforated Leather Converse Chuck Taylors, and are a Barneys exclusive. I prefer the term punched leather personally, and I'm a sucker for a good bit of punched leather.

I'll reference where I got this from when I've posted the other colours. Wouldn't want to ruin the surprise.

Dear Mum, For Christmas I would like... Teenage Flicks

I'm fortunate enough to have two sisters who clearly have a strong influence on the coolness of Christmas and birthday gifts I receive, although to be fair a hell of a lot of it has rubbed off on my folks as well.

As such, I have been given quite a few good coffee table books in the last few years. I don't want to ruin things by putting all the funky books I've seen recently on here, but this one is ok.



These are from Paul Willetts' book of Subbuteo reminiscences, Teenage Flicks. Which would go very well with a Subbuteo Ice Cube Tray.

I'm also impressed that two of the names off the front are heroes of mine, namely Des Lynam and David Baddiel.

Tee Du Jour - Snakes & Suits

This is a brand I was unaware of until it was brought to my attention by HideYourArms.

This, clearly, is a bit of a signature tee. I like.



Available from Snakes & Suits for $19.99

Dead or Alive at 5

If you just ignore the person that Pete Burns actually is and concentrate on this as a piece of pop music, it's brilliant.

Four o'clock funny - Cat Staff Meeting

More from Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy.

Sneaks Du Jour - Reebok Court Victory Pump

I never made it round to the Nike pop-up store in Shoreditch because I am the sort of person too lazy to bother to find something that interests me on my own doorstep until it's too late. A lesson learnt I think.

Anyway, Reebok have apparently launched their first pop-up store (am I the only person who envisions it being flat until you open the door? Like a pop-up book? No?) in New York, and will be selling a weekly special edition sneaker.



The first week is the NYC Court Victory Pump. It's garish but it's good. And, if you're in Manhattan, specifically on Bowery, it'll set you back around $135.

Dear Mum, For Christmas I would like... Doradimon Trucker Cap

I discovered wrongwroks fairly recently and I just love their stuff. Lots of their T-Shirts will be appearing on the site in the coming weeks as they feature mashed up cartoon characters and bold slogans, both of which I am a sucker for.



I'm not certain if trucker caps are still in but this, featuring Doradimon, the Adidas sneaker-wearing version of popular Japanese character Doraemon, is cool nonetheless.

Slightly on the pricey side at $45, from wrongwroks.

Tee Du Jour - Fucking Hipsters by Vig Tees

I like a good bold statement on a T-Shirt. Expect to see a good few. I am, however, conscious that people feel that wearing such a garment gives them licence to shout hilarious ripostes. These people I call idiots.



On a separate but related note, I used to work in Office in Manchester and wore a variety of T-Shirts, often with some writing on somewhere. None of them, to my recollection, had any statements anywhere near as bold as this one from Vig Tees. Some of them had writing I couldn't actually decipher.

Anyway every day I would pop to the nearest newsagent for some chocolate and a can of pop (hence why I am fat and have bad teeth). And every day, without fail, the Indian guy in the shop would simply recite what it said on my T-Shirt and smile. In the grand scheme of things, it isn't a massive crime, I agree. Particularly when the standard of customer service in the world is poor. But what was I supposed to say back?

I had to stop going into the shop when, after deciding to foresake any words for a plain old superhero T-Shirt, he just started naming the fucking superheroes. Which, to be fair, was quite helpful. There were a lot of them and I didn't recognise some of them. But there was a principle at stake.

It's the same reason why I've stopped having to wear my 'Sorry I'm Late' tee. Idiots the lot of them.

$19 from Vig Tees
.

Four o'clock funny - May I be blunt with you?

More from Nick Frost in Man Stroke Woman.

Sneaks Du Jour - More Adidas SL 72 Vintage

I already showed you the blue Adidas SL 72 Vintage this time last week. Here are the greeny turquoisey ones.

Can I get these in a size 9 please?

This is novel - the actual JD (formerly JD Sports) logo on top of a JD-branded phone box.



I was a little perplexed by this and at first tried to work out how someone could have stolen the sign from a branch and then attached it to a phone box, and why. Then I had to do a double-take to check they weren't flogging trainers from inside the phone box. How ridiculous. There's barely room to bend down to tie your laces.

This isn't the most spectacular example of outdoor advertising I've ever seen, and it's a bit hidden under the trees, but it's different and powerful in its own way. The location by a bus stop is, in the nicest possible way, probably a pretty clever bit of siting for a company like JD.

Dear Mum, For Christmas I would like... Tokyoflash Scope Watch

Any watch that requires a You Tube demonstration has got to be pretty out there. This bad boy, the Tokyoflash Scope SV, redefines how you actually tell the time. That's a pretty bold thing to do by my reckoning.



It's available in a variety of materials and with different coloured LEDs, and retails at around €149 from Pamparampa, who I've only just discovered but am becoming a big fan of.

Here it is in action:

It's Raining Men at 10

The second and final installment in the gayest series of posts I've ever done. Just to balance that out, I'd like it placed on record that I secretly really fancy Geri Halliwell. She's my favourite Spice Girl. So there.

Dani Behr Watch - The End!

Dani Behr just got voted off I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! Dammit. Oh well, I was tiring of the show anyway and am off to Malta for four days in the early hours, so it's probably for the best.

Let's go out with a bang.

Dani Behr Watch - Show your support on Facebook

While watching I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here last night and researching yesterday's Dani Behr watch, I accidentally downloaded the Facebook application that is intended to show your support for your favourite celeb.



It's a good idea and allows you to show how much you want your fave to win by reading up on them and watching videos on the official I'm a Celebrity site.

Find out more about the Celeb Tracker here.

Tee Du Jour - Doradimon by Wrongwroks

Doraemon, like Domo-kun, is a very popular Japanese character. There's a song that Japanese kids sing hich helps you learn how to draw his face.

That would be no use to wrongwroks, however, as this features only the back of Doraemon, who is wearing Adidas trainers and legging it, hence Doradimon.



At $40 plus shipping, it ain't cheap. It is cool, though.

From wrongwroks.

Four o'clock funny - The Paedofinder General

"Is French cricket not cricket with tongues?"

This speaks for itself. I hope they bring back Monkey Dust.

Sneaks Du Jour - Nike Dunk Hi St.Pauli

Pirates have been pretty big this year, what with the Facebook Pirate Language Craze following International Pirate Day and the whole thing in the last month or so with actual pirates doing actual piracy, stealing ships and demanding ransoms instead of making lame copies of DVDs.

With celebs like Russell Brand sporting the skull and crossbones motif and the general renaissance of all things wooden-legged and parrot-shouldered, I reckon these Nike Dunk Hi St Pauli limited edition trainers should do quite well.



St. Pauli are a German football club whose fans are remarkable in a kind of 1980s Wimbledon 'Crazy Gang' kind of way. Only more so. Hence why this is possibly the first pair of trainers to bear the name of a football/ soccer team that isn't an absolute gaudy monstrosity.



There are only 500 pairs of these worldwide, but you can pick them up for a relative steal at £89.99.

Katy Perry, David Beckham and The Ting Tings Celebrate Originality

There are a hell of a lot of celebs in this new ad for Adidas Originals, including David Beckham, Katy Perry, Estelle, Method Man and The Ting Tings, apparently.



I've never tried to upload a video before, so if this doesn't work, you can watch it yourself on the Adidas site here.

Yeah that didn't work. I've found it on You Tube though.

Dear Mum, For Christmas I would like... Paul Smith Lomo Fisheye Camera

I haven't owned a camera for a long time. Probably about 15 years. Yes, I've had one on my phone and I've used disposable cameras, but I haven't had my own.

If I were to get one, I would want an interesting one. Almost certainly a Lomography one, of the sort I'm always ogling in Urban Outfitters.

This is a Lomography Fisheye camera with a Paul Smith twist, which makes it ace. I fear that it's limited edition nature may make it impossible to come by, but that won't stop me wanting one.



They were available from the Paul Smith site. Sadly no more.

It's Raining Men at 10

I had to decide whether to use the Geri Hallwell version or the Weathergirls version. I couldn't. So I'm doing one today and the other tomorrow. Because I'm lazy and running out of ideas. It's December soon, and we'll be moving on to Christmas Number Ones. At 1, probably.

These are the Weathergirls. And have they got news for you? I'm not being funny, but surely the answer to that is, 'No, they've got weather.'

XBox 360 Lips Ad

I don't have a huge amount to say about this, except I saw it for the first time last night and I liked it.

It's for the XBox 360's new karaoke game 'Lips', which features chordless microphones that mean your girlfriend won't drag the console across the room. Nice idea.

Dani Behr Watch - Eviction Night

They've finally thrown someone out of I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! I was beginning to think it wasn't a game show at all.

Anyway, despite his brave efforts in the jungle gym task, the fact that he is a bit of a pompous bully got Robert Kilroy-Silk the boot. Ahead of David Van Day, which is bound to annoy the camp.

Dani Behr is still there. She had won immunity through some task or other, probably the being fit task, so wasn't even in the vote.

Here's a lovely pic of her smiling in the jungle. While discussing her attempt at a pop career I believe. Lovely stuff.

Tee Du Jour - NY Hearts Me

I've only just got on board with the word 'heart' instead of 'love', but I'm warming to it. It was off to a bad start with the very dubious film I Heart Huckabees which, apart from sucking, had nothing to do with then-Norwich City and now San Jose Earthquakes winger Darren Huckerby. The rookie of the year, don't you know. At 32.

Anyway this is a cool T-Shirt and a twist of the I Heart NY thing. I quite like the I Heart Hackney stuff you see around but, although I live in Hackney, I don't especially heart it. I heart Broadway Market, but I couldn't get that on a T-Shirt in a suitable style.



Anyway, this is available at a knock-down €11 from La Fraise. And no, I don't know what the deal is with the dog.

Four o'clock funny - The Dead Kenny Sketch

A strange tribute to Monty Python from South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

Sneaks Du Jour - Adidas Micropacer Lux

Adidas Micropacers are exactly the sort of trainer my girlfriend would look at me funny for buying, yet I've wanted a pair for a long, long time.

Whenever I happen upon some that are a bit different, however, they tend to turn out as very limited edition and consequently super pricey. Not these, however.



The Adidas Micropacer Lux still has the timer in it, in case you need to cook an egg or something, but will only set you back around $125 when it hits the streets in Spring. It's part of the Lux collection which, given my penchant for Adidas Originals stuff, is likely to feature heavily in these pages.



I only recently started to get on board with black sneakers, having previously thought they always looked like football boots/ shoes for 'special' people. I have now altered my opinion.

Babylon Zoo at 2

Babylon Zoo at 2 was the inspiration for this and I nearly completely forgot it. This was quite cool when it came out. I though it was anyway.

Dear Mum, For Christmas I would like... Flud Boombox Watch

There have been a few Boombox-related items floating around of late, the Lasonic i931 iPod Boombox being the main one.

This Boombox watch, by Flud, will set you back around $90 in either black or gun metal, which I have always thought sounded a bit threatening.



Unfortunately only the watch bit works. It's still cool.

Available from Flud

Thanks to Retro to Go

Tee Du Jour - Domo-Kun by Pamparampa

In tandem with Sneaks Du Jour, I'll now be whacking up a T-Shirt to kick-start your evening.

For those that question whether I actually do any work at my actual job, I would like to point out that I tend to create all my regular features in bulk and 'schedule' them. Hence why they all appear at the same time. I would have to be exceptionally anal to manage it otherwise.

Anyway, T-Shirts. This is Domo-Kun, one of those ubiquitous cartoon characters from Japan. I bought my big sis a Domo-Kun alarm clock, which makes a quite aggressive noise and does a sort of stomping motion. I'm not going to lie to you, I'm guted I gave it away.



This fine T-Shirt is available from Pamparampa.

Four o'clock funny - Gypsy Russell Brand

"I wouldn't shag any of the skanky girls round here. Except for your mum. Obviously."

The Inbetweeners. Last time I think.

Vanessa Paradis at 3

Or Joe Le Taxi at 3. Whichever way you look at it, it's a winner. Almost certainly the only song in history to contain the essential GCSE French vocabulary phrase 'embouteillage', or traffic jam.

Sneaks Du Jour - Adidas Italia 1960

An update on the classic Adidas Italia 1960 in a very stylish white and green. The reissue is available from January, apparently.

Dear Mum, For Christmas I would like... Subbuteo Ice Cube Tray

I was describing this to a friend the other day and he pointed out that you could effectively have made ice cubes with the tray that housed Subbuteo players in the original packs. That failed to cool my interest, however.



The Subbuteo Flick and Kick Ice Tray has superb retro value and allows you to make ten normal sized outfield player type ice cubes (which, if this picture is accurate, look ace) and one goalkeeper, presumably for a long drink.



I fully intend to get one and attempt to make a Norwich City team using some kind of lemon and lime cordial. It'll never work.

Available from Cute Gadgets for £5.99

Hollyoaks Late Night

If you're easily offended, don't look at the picture below. To be honest, you should probably be here.

If you're not easily offended but the picture offends you, I'm sorry. It made me giggle and I'm of the South Park school of 'if you take the piss out of everything, you're not prejudiced against anything'.



I'm being forced to watch the late night version of Hollyoaks. It appears to be based around all my least favourite characters, particularly the Irish contingent.

I have no emotional connection to these idiots and don't really see why E4 are giving over air time to a show that uses the phrase 'pant moustache' as a means of taking advantage of looser language restrictions.

Therefore I'm taking this opportunity to put up this picture, which came off the SLAMXHYPE site, to show my disdain for the occasionally tranny one and his nob head brother and their AIDS, which Hollyoaks is well out of its depth with and which will be forgotten about in six weeks.

Like Paul Scholes playing King Rollo...

Bayern Munich and France midfielder Franck Ribery conjures up the idea of a few movies from looking at him. You know Ribery, he looks like Peter Beardsley would have looked if he'd been brought up in care. The photo below proves this beyond all doubt. I don't think I've heard Ribery speak, but I bet he sounds like the Elephant Man and generates too much phlegm.



Which is why I am absolutely astonished to see him starring in this advert for the Nike Mercurial Vapour Rosa. It's based around the start of The Pink Panther Show. The jaunty one, not the suspenseful 'der der' one. The only connection I can see is that Ribery is French, like Inspector Clouseau, and the boots are pink.



Yes, pink football boots. Nicklas Bendtner of Arsenal got an inordinate amount of stick for sporting the same new boots at the weekend. As well as this sort of thing from the Telegraph, Matthew Le Tissier was horrendously scathing about Bendtner wearing such a garment when having done 'nothing in the game'. Not Saturday's game, football. Harsh but true.



Anyway, Ribery is a quality player but this is kind of like Paul Scholes being King Rollo. Unlikely, but brilliant. It's worth watching just to remind you of the music, too. Well done Nike.

Franck Ribery in The Pink Panther Ad for Nike

Bayern Munich and France midfielder Franck Ribery conjures up the idea of a few movies from looking at him. You know Ribery, he looks like Peter Beardsley would have looked if he'd been brought up in care.



Which is why I am absolutely astonished to see him starring in this advert for the Nike Mercurial Vapour Rosa. It's based around the start of The Pink Panther Show. The jaunty one, not the suspenseful 'der der' one. The only connection I can see is that Ribery is French, like Inspector Clouseau, and the boots are pink.



Yes, pink football boots. Nicklas Bendtner of Arsenal got an inordinate amount of stick for sporting the same new boots at the weekend. As well as this sort of thing from the Telegraph, Matthew Le Tissier was horrendously scathing about Bendtner wearing such a garment when having done 'nothing in the game'. Not Saturday's game, football. Harsh but true.



Anyway, Ribery is a quality player but this is kind of like Paul Scholes being King Rollo. Unlikely, but brilliant. It's worth watching just to remind you of the music, too. Well done Nike.

Four o'clock funny - Poppadoms and Salad and Yoghurt and Shit

"Not it is a tricky bit of floor that. Deceptively flat."

Long before Goodness Gracious Me and the 'Going out for an English' sketch, Rowan Atkinson Live nailed the tradition of going for a pissed up curry. Love it.

Sneaks Du Jour - Converse Poorman Hi

Another part of the Converse Century Project, the Converse Poorman Hi is a premium leather job and will set you back just shoy of 100 Euros. Which is about £400 now isn't it?

Dani Behr Watch - Week Two

I've lost count of where I'm up to with Dani Behr watch owing to a bout of illness and the distraction of Football Manager 2009. Judging by the spike in traffic on my site of people looking for Dani Behr-related pictures and news, I am guessing her career revival goals from going on the show could be coming to fruition.

According to her husband in the press at the end of last week, she's heading back to the UK after I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here finishes, and will attempt to revive The Word. Whether or not Terry Christian is on board was not revealed, nor was whether the shocking and groundbreaking nature of the show could be repeated nowadays.



It would definitely be interesting to see how they do it. I don't think they should update it too much. The psychedelic studio and textbook disorganised live outside broadcasts were massive factors in the 'charm' of the whole thing. I would definitely be in favour of bringing back Hufty, and possibly even Katie Puckrick, who I have a small crush on. That's Katie Puckrick the crush, not Hufty, the bald Geordie Lesbian. Although thinking about it I think I might mean Sarah Cawood, who was The Girlie Show wasn't she?

More Dani Behr news when I can be arsed.

911 at 1

You have to get through a hell of a lot on You Tube to find anything by 911, for obvious reasons. It was only then that I realised I didn't know the name of any 911 songs. I did remember the tune for this one, however. Apparently it's called Party People.

Four o'clock funny - Bouncy bouncy!

"Shoes all in a line"

BBC Worldwide are very savvy about this You Tube malarkey, which means it's not possiblt to embed a pantload of stuff. The same goes for Channel 4, who have ruined my attempts to include Peep Show in any Four o'clock funnies.

I have managed to locate a good clip from the Mighty Boosh. It doesn't feature The Moon, my favourite character, but it does feature crimping, a phenomenon shamelessly ripped off by a Sugar Puffs advert, of all things. I ask you.

Alabama 3 at 3

Woke Up This Morning - the theme tune from The Sopranos. Which is the best TV show of all time. Which makes this the best TV theme tune of all time.

Sneaks Du Jour - Adidas ZX 700 I-Store

The letter 'I' from the Adidas Consortium AZX Collaboration Project, and a belter at that.

Four o'clock funny - I think you are some kilometres away in your head

More from Harry and Paul's Polish Cafe. Spot on.

Sneaks Du Jour - MoBama Dunk 08

As if Barack Obama hadn't been pervasive enough in our lives, artist Virtual Mo created these Nike Dunks called the Mobama Dunk 08.



You can't buy these, but it doesn't stop them being good. It probably makes them better.

Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You at 2

Ah, Glenn Medeiros. A good song to do at karaoke.

Four o'clock funny - It's very mainstream innocuous

Two Ducks watch Meet the Parents. More good work from Seth MacFarlane.

Suddenly at 3

Yes, it's Angry Anderson with the most emotional piece of music ever written. Because it was played at the wedding of Scott and Charlene in Neighbours. Which is Jason Donovan and Kylie Minogue, but if you have to ask you really should get out more.

This isn't the proper video, it's a montage of the weddings from Neighbours over a 20-year period. During which time they didn't manage to come up with a better line to interrupt nuptials than, 'I'm sorry. I can't do this.'

Having said that, I love and miss Neighbours. The money shot, ie the thumping drums into the chorus, is after 57 seconds. Enjoy.

Sneaks Du Jour - Adidas SL72 Vintage

I get stick when I wear brightly coloured trainers. These are pretty damn sweet though.



They're not out until next Spring apparently, and will cost about $85. I'm only showing you the blue ones now. Keep an eye out for the other colours.

Have It Your Way Remix - Burger King Mashups with Universal Music

I received an email this morning from MadWaves highlighting a fantastic collaboration between Burger King and You Tube using MadWaves technology.



Have It Your Way Remix is a mashup tool using Universal Music artists, including Pussycat Dolls, Nelly, Rihanna and Mariah Carey.



It's a pretty simple tool involving picking two videos and adjusting the audio and video balance between the two. I initially tried Weezer's Pork and Beans and Snoop Dogg's Drop It Like It's Hot, but I suck. I then tried Don't Cha and Umbrella which was better but I still suck.



You can save your efforts and view other people's. Unfortunately, unless I'm missing something, you can't embed the results, but it's still a quality free tool and another good example of how Burger King have progressed in using online media as a means of offering free, valuable content to users.